Chapter 97 – Free Like a Butterfly

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“This place seems unremarkable…”

Muttered Arina as she stared at the Rose Garden.

“It’s proof that we’re living in peace.
Somewhere in this world, there are boys and girls with the same age as us that are living in constant fear of war.
We should be grateful to our predecessors who made it possible for us to have this kind of peaceful daily life.”

“You really love to say outrageous things like this, huh? Funny.”

“Spare me that monotonous tone.”

“Anyway, moving on.”

Arina stood up and grabbed her pencil.

Spring break was just around the corner.

We only needed to pass the mock exam next month, that was why we had been studying together here.
After that, we would be officially third-years.
Things would get even busier then, the perk of being third-years.

Like they said, we would only enjoy our high school life up to our second-year.
The last year of school? It was just a hellish year filled with competition.
Lucky that our school was in the laid-back category rather than the competitive one.
I heard that the hellish year of the latter kind started from the moment you entered the school itself.

A few days had passed since the day I quit the going-home club and we started hanging out as we used to.
Though, all we did was just study together.
Nevertheless, I was happy that I could be together with her again.

Though, sometimes I couldn’t help but feel depressed.
There were times when we had trouble communicating with each other since everything about me was completely erased from her memories.
I had to cope with the reality that my efforts on trying to make her remember me was futile.
Instead, it felt more like we were meeting each other for the first time.

‘I can’t remember anything about you, but I’ll remember everything about you from now on.’

I knew that if things went on like this, the awkwardness between us would eventually go away and she would no longer be bothered by the discrepancies in our memories, but…

It still felt lonely.

Whenever she looked at me straight into my eyes, I couldn’t look at her back.
The action made me cling to the hope that she would remember everything someday.

“Sui, can I say something?”

She put down her pencil again as she said that.

“Go ahead.”

“I watched a movie, the story went like this.
Once upon a time, there was a guy who went back to the past countless times in order to save his lover.
He tried to change the future by doing small actions, trying to utilize the butterfly’s effect to create a future where they could be happy together.”

“It’s sci-fi?”
“Yes.
Anyway, everytime he went back in time, he realized that he couldn’t change anything.
He couldn’t save his lover and their fate remained the same.
But, he still went on with the small hope that they could be together one day.” (E/N: Kinda looks like “The Butterfly Effect”)

Arina opened her note.
I was surprised that she did that easily.
I thought the note was supposed to be a secret?

The page she showed me was a page about Sakaki Sui.

“What do you think happened next?”

“After going through a lot of suffering, they’ll finally reach a happy ending?”

“Nope.
In the end, they didn’t get together at all.
He chose to break off their relationship for the sake of his lover’s happiness.
It was a bittersweet ending.”

“That’s…”

“Does it remind you of something?”

“Hm?”

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“You.
He did a similar thing as you.
Sacrificing yourself for me and trying to create a bittersweet ending for yourself.”

“W-W-Why are you mentioning that? Stop it, it’s embarrassing! Someone, bring me a black coffee! 500ml of it should be enough to kill me and save me from this embarrassment!”

Arina let out a giggle.

“The protagonist was able to go back in time by reading his own diary.
It’s like this, say that I’m the protagonist and I read this part of my note where I meet you.
I can go back to that time and keep my memory while I’m doing it.
Anyway, in the end, the protagonist burned his diary.” (E/N: Definitely The Butterfly Effect)

“And in return, they never see each other again, huh?”

“My note is similar to that diary.
I don’t really need this note anymore since I got my memories back.”

“Are you getting rid of it?”

Arina put her hand on her chin and gave me a squint when she heard that question.

“Of course not.
I want to remember you.”

“!”

An incomprehensible sound that my brain couldn’t even understand leaked out of my mouth.
I froze like a villain who had just been stabbed in the chest and knew that he was about to die.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t a villain with plot armor, so I could only remain as immobile as a statue.

So unfair.
I wasn’t used to hearing such sweet words coming from her mouth.

“Hehe… Isn’t this the part where you reply with your best jokes?”

“Dummy, I can’t respond to it because your sweet line melted my teeth away.”

“My, sorry about that.
I’ll make sure to melt through your bones too next time.”

*   *   *

The buds of the cherry blossoms were beginning to bloom, a clear sign of spring starting.
The cold morning air we had been inhaling for the past few months began to be replaced by the warmth of spring.

“I’ve known you for a while now.”

During the lunch break on the day before spring break.
It was after the morning ceremony that officially announced our status as third-years had ended. 

It was time for me to say goodbye to Makoto.

“From the battle of Normandie to the battle for defending the Earth’s base on the moon, we sure have gone a long way since then…”

“I don’t remember any of that happening, but yeah, we’ve known each other for a while.”

“I still remember the first time I took up my first electromagnetic weapon.
That time when I first shot down an autonomous machine still lingers in my mind…”

“It was amazing, yeah, sure.”

“For my beloved daughter, I–”

“Oh my God, Sui, please speak like a normal person…”

Makoto raised his arms in surrender.
I had known him for two years.
I knew more than anyone that it was tough to deal with a weirdo like me, but he stayed by my side for that long.
I was really thankful for his kindness.

“When we fought that tribe deep inside the Amazon–”

“I’ve never even left Japan!”

“Well, in any case, thanks for everything, Makoto.
I’ll look forward to spending the year with you again.”

“And you’re back to normal so suddenly, I swear… Whatever, me too, man.”

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“Mhm.”

The probability of us getting into the same class again was really low, but it didn’t hurt to hope, right? I might meet some new faces in my new class and that was cool and all, but I’d have preferred to be with my old friends more.

It would take time for my classmates to get used to a weirdo like me.
I guess I had to start by telling them about my tomato juice addiction, huh?

After my conversation with Makoto, I still had to deal with another errand.
Akakusa-sensei called me over.
Since she also told me to bring Arina along, the matter should be related to her.

I arrived at the infirmary and knocked on the door.

“I’m here, Sensei.”

From where I was standing, I saw Arina’s back.
The girl was sitting in front of Akakusa-sensei.
When she heard my voice, she turned her body around to see me.
I casually greeted her while raising my hand weakly.

“Welcome.
I’m sorry to bother you two during this time.”

“Don’t mention it, Sensei.
Is there a problem?”

I sat down on one of the chairs.

“Well, they decided that I’ll be transferred.”

“T-T-T-T-T-Trans–”

“Sui-kun, calm down.
Listen to my words properly first.”

“T-T-T—”

So the rumor was true.

A while ago, a rumor was circulating that they were going to transfer Akakusa-sensei somewhere.
The reason was that it was simply because she had been working in this school for a long time.

Seriously.

Why the hell did they decide to take away our school’s flower for such a trivial reason like that? I should try to find the guy who made this decision.
I swear that I would break his fingers to the point that he could only dream about holding a chalk again. 

“T-T-T—”

“Be quiet.”

Arina shook me by the shoulders to make me shut up.
Both the unacceptable reality and her shaking made me feel sick. 

I held my mouth and tried not to vomit out the seven liters of tomato juice in my stomach.

“…Are you telling me the truth, Sensei?”
“Yes.
The journalism club should write an article about it soon.”

“No way…”

“That’s part of the reason why I’m calling you two here.”

Akakusa-sensei then bent her back and bowed her head.

“In the end, I didn’t do anything to help you two.
I’m a failure of a teacher.
Please, forgive me.”

“S-S-S-Sensei, please raise your head! It’s me who should be bowing my head! I’m just a sinful man, I can’t let a goddess like you do this, oh boy, what should I do? Should I just die now?”

“No you shouldn’t.
Sui-kun, Arina-san, I’m sorry.
I couldn’t do anything to help you two, especially you, Arina-san.
I’m sorry for being an unreliable teacher.”

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Her voice shook as she continued to apologize.
I wanted to look away.
The sight of her trying to hold back her tears pained me.

She should know more than anyone that she shouldn’t blame herself, yet…

“That’s not true, Sensei. In fact, I’m grateful to you for going along with my selfishness.
It was me who refused your advice to go see a doctor, wasn’t it?”

Arina moved closer to her and wrapped her hands around Sensei’s hands, which were placed on her lap.

“The other me asked you to find someone that I could talk to and Sensei did your best to help me find that person.
Because of that, I met and befriended a lot of people.
If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
So, please, don’t blame yourself, Sensei.”

Her words seemed to have an effect on Akakusa-sensei as tears started falling down on her thighs.
She held back her sobs, but she still managed to mutter out another apology to Arina.

I wasn’t part of the homosexual’s community, but seeing two beautiful women together like this made my heart flutter a little.

If the Venomous Arina found out about this thought of mine, she would definitely chop my body into pieces and use it as lion’s food or something.

In any case, until everything calmed down, I decided to observe and appreciate this beautiful work of art in front of me.

*   *   *

“Eh? What do you mean?”

After Arina left, I briefly told Akakusa-sensei about her current condition.
The fact that she already remembered everything except me.
How her tone and attitude became softer.
Of course, I also told her that the rehabilitation project was pretty much a success.

She seemed to agree to that last part as she nodded her head.

“So that’s why she’s meeker than usual.”

“Yes.
She hasn’t swore a single time ever since then, it’s kinda unsettling.
I hope she could swear at me more…”

“But why did she forget about you?”
“Strange, isn’t it?”

“I have heard cases in the past where people who woke up from their coma forgot about everything but their lover, but in her case, it’s the complete opposite…”

“What an amazing case.
Is it the so-called power of love?”

“I don’t know.
Maybe the person’s will to not forget about their lover was strong enough to make it possible? It was probably what happened to Arina-san too.”

“Huh? I don’t understand…”

“Sui-kun, you’re an important person to her.
Let’s use this analogy.
Think of your consciousness where you store your memory as a wine glass.
When all her memories came rushing to her, the wine glass overflowed from how much content it received and because of that, you, the biggest occupant of the wine glass was forcefully pushed out from it.”

“If that’s what happened, I’m going to cry for real.”

“Hehehe.
It’s just my baseless speculation, don’t mind it.”

I knew that I was someone important to her. 

And I knew that trying to find out the cause of it was pointless.
Memory was a fickle thing to begin with.
We simply couldn’t control the things that we would remember and forget.

That was why Arina’s declaration that she would try to remember everything about me was absurd.
Even if she somehow remembered about me, there was no guarantee that it would happen when she was still in school.
Maybe she would remember when she was already part of the workforce or worst case scenario, when she was old enough to meet her grandchildren. 

This world wouldn’t give us a satisfying happy ending, but at the same time, it wouldn’t give us a bad ending as well.

Everything was up to us.

*   *   *

On my way back from the infirmary, I bumped into Shirona.

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She was putting her hand on her chest and refused to meet my eyes when I greeted her.

“Sui, there’s something strange with Arina-san…”

“That’s a really subtle way to describe a weirdo like her.”

“She is not a weirdo! Anyway, did you two get into a fight?”

I knew what she was trying to say.
Finally she noticed something in Arina’s behavior, but amnesia definitely wasn’t something that crossed her mind.

“Well, kinda, I guess?”

That was all I could say to her.

*   *   *

After school.

Some girls were crying after we finished taking our class’ pictures.
It was the sadness coming from the fact that they had to say their goodbyes to their friend that caused it.

Meanwhile, I was busy making random jokes like usual.

“Sui! At first, I thought you were just a total freak, but now I know that you’re actually a really nice guy! Thank you for everything!”

Said Toma.

“I know right? Can you believe that there are only a handful of people that are nicer than me? Around 6.8 billion of them! Crazy there’s so many bad people in this world!”

After that, Tsuru approached me.

“I’m going to miss you… You made my school year so much more enjoyable…”

“Likewise.
At first, I thought you were just a gyaru who can’t even multiply or recite the alphabet, but you’re actually a chicken who can walk on all fours!”

“I hope we’ll be in the same class next year so I can beat the crap out of you…”

In the hallway, I ran into the perverted ponytailed girl, Kaya.

“Do you know about this? When girls get excited, their breasts will get big–”
“Yes yes, the aborigines? Trinidad? Tobago?”

Like usual, I went back home earlier than everyone.
It wasn’t like everyone would be transferring away or anything, we would just be in different classes, there was no need for me to drown in sorrow like the rest of the class.

For a second, I was thinking of visiting the old Rose Garden, but strangely enough, I didn’t feel like it.

There was a reason for it, though.

“My, are you alone?”

Near the stairs, I found a girl standing with her back to the wall while fiddling with her phone.

“I’m alone and will forever be single!”

“The enemy of the nation, huh? It’s because people like you that our country’s birth rate is in decline.”

“I have a genuine reason for this.
It’s to seal my dangerous gene away.”

This was the reason why I didn’t go there.

Because she was here.

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