Today marks eight years since my parents died.

Ive lived a hell of a life without my mom most especially. Just recently, I got to find out about my illness and its cancer of the liver.

I have another appointment with Dr Dracula today coz Ive been experiencing some things lately.

Like the pain, nausea, dizziness, hallucinations, fever and cough. All of those weird symptoms are real. And they
e not from drugs; there is no way anyone would know that this was coming. Its just a little bit more intense than I imagined it to be. The worst thing though?

As promised I have to meet my doc in thirty minutes.

it just feels like I don have much time left.

its my biggest fear right now dying without getting justice for my parents. I just felt I haven done anything accountable.

do you sometimes have that feeling of being useless??

Im almost twenty-five, my birthday is just in six months.

Ive buried my life in books and the rest.

I don have many friends as I didn want anyone getting to know Im not a strong lady. my friend from college didn stick around much.

It now scares me to think someone can be permanent in my life, they eventually ditch me away coz Im too boring and cold.

Ive lived wrapped in my world that it seems so hard to open up to people.

but Ive got my childhood best friend Eris, shes my anchor and maybe the only one that knows me well and sometimes I find strength in our friendship. That keeps me going.

I have relatives that never show up either, since my parents died, no one called or texted or visited or anything.

my Dad left me a huge amount of money and Ive been alone in our mansion. Im fine with that.

but sometimes my thought wanders:

is there a Lil portion of happiness fate has reserved for me?

will I one day know what it feels like?

I sincerely have no idea.

”7:40 ” I muttered and got out of my thoughts.

it took ten minutes to make myself presentable.

I stared at the dressing mirror in front of me, I don need makeup to make me look beautiful.

My skin is flawl

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